Lord, thanks for allowing the Holy Spirit to work not only in my homiletic delivery this weekend, but also in my preparation! When it was finished I truly saw the reactions of Your people and the decisions they did and will make in the future. After I was finished greeting and talking with some people I had the thought, “Maybe you went too long, Chris.” And technically I did, because I told the first elder I was only going to be 30 minutes! And not only that, but I had a manuscript which was designed for 30 minutes!! And I went about 20min over what was written–what did I have to say for those 20min? Man, twenty minutes is a long time to be talking extra…
I asked a friend how I did, and she said it was good. I brought up the length issue and she said I was repeating myself quite often. Hmm…that made me think, and then I replied: “Well there are four different types of audiences, and I more than likely was trying to break it down to each type.” That sounded very rational, but later I thought, Did I really do it for that purpose? Or was I just finding an excuse to vindicate myself subconsciously repeating myself for 20min?
I was about to criticize myself harshly, until later that evening, and just now as I type, I came across a few factors. The first one was a guy on YouTube (Evor Myers) who was talking about entertainment and made the comparison to people who can sit and watch television for hours but when a sermon goes past a certain time period (usually 30min), they get edgy, impatient, and even sleepy. That comment made me lessen the self-chastisement for preaching almost an hour. The other factor was that a certain older gentleman called me over to talk to him after I was done preaching and began to tell me that he believes I was called to be a teacher. His reasoning? The logical progression he discerned in how the message was presented and then him observing that I reiterate certain points until I’ve assessed that all of the congregation is on the same page before I move on to the next point.
Teacher indeed. He was right, for that’s exactly what I’m studying to be. It’s great, Lord, to see when you’ve sent other people to me to confirm the calling I believe you’ve given me. It’s an awesome experience! Now, Lord, I really want to stick to the manuscript style and even memorize the words I’ve written, so I’ll be disciplined in only speaking what needs to be spoken. Sometimes, the little side nuggets aren’t worth saying, unless the Holy Spirit really impresses me to do so. I want to be more disciplined! I think I take for granted that you have given the gift of speaking/writing and can hold a congregation “hostage” knowing they wouldn’t have a problem with me going for 20 extra minutes because the dynamics with which you’ve blessed me to present your Word. So, no more of that! I want to be able to exercise discipline, even if my preaching wouldn’t weary the hearers.
Discipline...
It’s also interesting that You’ve brought to my attention I don’t do the same time extensions when I conduct seminars/workshops, or presentations in other venues outside of the church setting. What does that mean? That I deem others’ time more valuable outside the church setting? Or I’m less disciplined when preaching versus presenting? Hm…God I think it’s that I take for granted the fact that time limits aren’t stringent for most of the congregations I’ve been in and I treat workshops differently from homilies (sermons). But aren’t they different?! And should I not be able to take more time with explaining your Word? Should there be a time limit?! I believe there should be, and You know that I plan for one. But sometimes I go over the limit I set. I don’t bring the “just let the Spirit move” ideology when it comes to preaching, for did He not move when I was preparing? And letting the Spirit move doesn’t necessarily have to mean going longer than intended. It could mean going shorter!
Heavenly Father, thanks for allowing Your Spirit to use me this weekend. And I also ask that You help those who were listening to the message to begin or continue to draw closer to You through prayer, studying your Word, and loving others. Give me the discipline to say only what needs to be said. Thanks for your love and kindness towards us. Help me to become more like you.
